things I vow NOT to do this year

When was it that we all voted on exhaustion as a status symbol? (Thanks, Brene Brown). As I was leaving work on Friday, I ran into a colleague and noted in passing, "It's been a productive week. You have to feel good going into the weekend." As he proceeded through the door he sighed, "No matter. I'm working all weekend anyway."

At first I felt guilty that I don't plan to haul my work home for the weekend and then I reminded myself of the things I said I would not do in 2013 so that I can live a balanced life. When George Bernard Shaw said, "I want to be thoroughly used up when I die" I don't think he was talking about letting his life get sucked into the vortex of one thing without tending the rest. All of the categories of life - work, play, family, friends - are meant to work in concert and not opposition. So in the spirit of Shaw and Brown both, I have decided that in 2013 I will not:

• take my day job home with me.
• permit myself to blow off exercise, unless I'm sick.
• stress over the pressure to grow plants in my house; I'll use the planter to collect wine corks.
• let my herbs mildew in the bottom of the vegetable drawer.
• stress over mildewed food in the bottom of the vegetable drawer.
• use the three step system for washing my fact; two will do.
• keep my house pristine; I compensate with low lighting.
• cook dinner every night; my children are old enough to heat a frozen pizza.
• schedule impossible-to-meet back-to-back commitments; my life needs more margin.
• leave the house in a rush without kissing my husband and kids; they're the why for most of life.

What are you doing to add margin or value in your life?

falling well

Listening to Daughtry as I write, this first week of the new year has made a poignant impact on my resolve. Santa brought skis for Christmas. The year started with a ski day at Copper Mountain January 1. 16º and intermittent sun made it difficult to move, difficult to enjoy skiing without stopping to blow in my hands. To boot (no pun intended), my boots were too large, which left me little to know ability to navigate. I fell more times in one day than in the 20 years I've skied. Here's the fun part.

There was a juncture rendering two choices: return my skis and take up reading in the lodge or keep the skis and try again in a few weeks, maybe with better boots. On a warmer day.

Whatever it is you tried last year that didn't work, it's not over yet. Yes, you will fall. Yes, it will hurt. Yes, mean people will laugh and tell you to give it up. We can't get rid of the mean people, but we can change the way we respond to them.

This is the year to learn to laugh at failure. Fall with grace, if not just a sense of humor. Get up and attack your mountain again.